My Sweet, Little, Finger-Sucking Girl

Oh, my sweet, little, finger-sucking baby girl.

Joci, you will never know how hard getting you to stop sucking your thumb is on me.

Sounds selfish, doesn't it?

It's not hard because you whine or throw tantrums. It's not hard because you are angry with me when I remind you to take your finger out of your mouth. And, it's not because you are sneaky, hiding behind the couch with your blankie and your finger firmly planted in that little cupid's bow mouth of yours.

No, it's because I cannot tolerate to see you in pain.

It's obvious that it hurts you to be told to stop comforting yourself.

You have begged and pleaded with giant crocodile tears in your eyes as I have wrapped your sucking finger in a sticky bandaid.

You have negotiated for just short spurts of sucking time, and you have gazed into my eyes willing me to let you suck, just for a little longer.

It hurts my heart to see you suffer like this. I know it's necessary, I know you need me to be firm, yet encouraging to help you kick your habit. But, it's so hard to see you this way.

When you are feeling so helpless, angry, and sad, I just hold you and tell you that I love you. I tell you that you will get through this, that you are the most strong willed person I know, so I know that you can do it. I hold you and rock you and stroke your hair and tell you that it will be ok.

I hope this is enough for you. I hope that you hear me and believe what I am saying. I hope that in some small way I am helping you.

I look forward and see so many more times like these to come, and hope that I can help you, in my small way, to navigate them.

I will always love you, my sweet, little, finger-sucking girl.