Starbucks Date Night with the Kids

We had a fun Saturday.  Jon typically has the kids Friday nights and then we meet up on Saturday morning to exchange.  Yesterday we met at a rummage sale for the exchange and to look around, it turned out to be a sad rummage sale, but it was nice to get out and do something a little different.  The kids and I headed home afterwords and then everyone kind of did their own thing.  This has become more and more common as the kids grow older.  It makes me a little sad, but at least I know that I'm not the only one going through it!  Joe had Pokemon league in the afternoon and Joci played with a friend while I kind of picked up around the house.  Later we went to Target for a few things.  First off, though, we needed a little Starbucks pick me up, thanks to a lovely gift card from the holidays!  After a good look around Target, they are rearranging the store so you have to look in every corner, we went and had a few tacos. 
Sure, this sounds like a boring night to most people, but not to me.  My favorite times are when the kids and I just chat about what's going on in our lives, and we giggle and laugh, and joke around making silly fools of ourselves.  It's these times that I know that I am building the foundation of our futures.  I hope they see that they can talk about anything with me, that I'm not scary, that they can share their lives and not fear having those challenging conversations.

B-I-N-G-O!

A couple of weeks ago we had a really nice family night out.  Jon typically has the kids Friday nights, but invited me to eat dinner with them.  After, Jon and the kids were going to go to the school district’s Bingo night.  I wanted to go, but it wasn’t my night for the kids, and I didn’t want to intrude on their time.  I got lucky, I was invited to go along. 

All in all it was a really fun night.  No doubt the schools made a ton of money.  The kids won a few Bingos (I won once), but we didn’t win any raffles, which is what we were really after.  Joe even put in for a NCIS prize that had photos and autographs as he believes that is his Grandma’s favorite show!  Awwww! 

Unfortunately, luck wasn’t on our side, but everyone did have fun!  It was a great opportunity, too, to show the kids that even though Mom and Dad aren’t together anymore, we are all still a family.

March 9, 2018

Well, Hello There!

Hello There!

My goodness it’s been a very long time since I’ve posted on my blog.  I should probably apologize, but have reminded myself that it’s my blog, and there has been a lot going on that has been highly distracting.  That being said, I was showing my coworker some photos I had taken while we were in Bristol as she didn’t know who Banksy was, and also was curious about Bristol as we have an office there, too.  As I looked through the photos I was struck by a few things, mostly with how little the kids were, but also, how much I really loved it there.  I long for England.  If I could, I would be back there in a split second.  There are so many periods in our lives, I think, that people look back on and realize that it was the happiest time of their lives.  England was definitely, without doubt, mine.  I have such lovely friends there, the weather was lovely – for me-, and the atmosphere, it’s just so much more the way I’d like to live my life.  Now, it’s starting to fade.  There are times when I close my eyes and can remember the walk, with real clarity, to the schools and market.  I remember my friend’s homes and how cozy I felt there.  I remember our house and the vegetables we grew in the back.  I really loved it there.

Here, though, in the now, I am rebuilding a life that is so different.  Jon and I are separated, sharing custody of the kids, and figuring out how co-parenting works for us, and how to navigate all the things that come up in our new dynamic.  I think we do pretty well, overall, there are some prickly bits here and there, but mostly we’re working it out.  The kids are doing well, growing faster than I ever thought was possible. 

Joseph is 14!  A year past becoming a teenager, and it shows.  His moods can sometimes give me whiplash, but he’s still an amazing person, for a teenager!  He’s just finished up wrestling which is quickly becoming his sport of choice.  Joe had an amazing year for wrestling, coming in just short of going to State.  He was very dedicated and worked extremely hard, giving it his all every day to get to where he was.  I think it was great for him to see the difference his intensity made in his performance.  To me, he looks more and more like Dad, especially in the eyes, that makes me so happy.  Dad would like that.  We have been going through all of the steps for him to go to high school next year.  I do not feel like he is old enough, let alone me being old enough, for him to be going to high school.  In my heart he’s always my little guy. 

Jocelyn is 12 and all girl, super girly girl.  She has lots of friends, with lots of drama.  She loves to sing, dance, text, and do Taekwondo.  Even though she is twelve, she too, gives me teenage mood whiplash.  Though, I am lucky that I still get loads of hugs, cuddles, and giggles from her, I’m afraid those are going to be coming to an end soon as well.  Joci struggles a bit with wanting to do everything Joe can do, not understanding that there is a huge difference between the ages of 12 and 14, and let’s be honest here, maturity levels, too.  This girl is going to turn all of my hair grey, but she has a heart of gold.  She is very loving and caring, and worried that everyone is happy and well.  She reminds me a lot of me when I was her age, but she looks so much like Jon’s sister, including her gorgeous hair.  Next year she will be heading to junior high school, as they are moving the 6^th grade there starting next year.  I’m happy that she is growing up in this time.  Hopefully, she will see all the changes that strong women are making now.

As for me, well, I can say I’m hanging in there.  It’s been a rough couple of years, and I feel like I am just now starting to peek out from behind the gloom.  I have a long ways to go to get back to the real me, but I will get there, someday.  I am enjoying watching the kids grow into their lives and anticipating how they’ll be when they’re older.  I’m working hard to try and keep them on a good path, while also trying to let them be themselves.  We have a new dog, Olive.  She is so different than any other dog we’ve had.  She is definitely a headstrong little shit sometimes, but she loves to play, and run, and run, and run…  She really loves her laser pointer that we play with her in the basement (finished) with.  She’s a good snuggler and bed hog, and she LOVES the kids, but not the guinea pigs so much.  We are pretty sure she is a lab mix of some sort and there’s got to be some hound in there, too, but we don’t care.  I do miss having my boxer boy, Jarvis, though.  I call her Jarvis probably about as much as I call her Olive.  Lots of new stuff going on, I love my work, my boss is amazing.  We’re looking forward to spring and growing a few plants on the patio, maybe getting a patio table and chairs so that we can eat outside now and again. 

March 22, 2018